If you'd like to read the uncensored version, go here: UNCENSORED
Yawning, I was still sort of zoned out from all the alcohol I'd guzzled the night before. Note to self: martini's, even when wrapped up in apples or pomegranate, are not your friend.
I had no idea where I was. And I didn't find it a good sign that I was not in my clothing from the night before. But at least I still had on my bra and underwear. Looking around, I was definitely in a guy's apartment.
Sighing, I said to myself, "Well, let's get this over with."
The buttery smell of eggs and bacon wafted through the hallway. My mouth watered. Eggs. Just what this hangover needed.
As I padded to the kitchen, the answer to all my questions loomed over the stove in nothing but pajama bottoms and a hairy chest.
I leaned on my arms at the counter. "Oh God. It's you."
"That's not the greeting you should be giving to the man who's bed you slept in last night." He smirked at me as if replaying what we did in said bed.
I rubbed my eyes and dropped to my elbows. I couldn't believe I was staring at Seth Gallagher--the jerk bouncer from ages ago, and my bartender from last night. I didn't even give him so much as a flirty glance. What the hell? "Please tell me I did not sleep with you. That would just turn what was the worst night of my life into a bonifide nightmare."
Pulling out a stainless steel bowl, he said, "I think I need to make more eggs. You look queasy."
"The word is hungover. And you didn't answer my question."
Pouring the eggs into another pan, he smiled. "What do you think happened?"
"Hello, lovebirds!" a man sang behind me.
I knew that voice.
It was Fashionista! Well, Tulip and I started calling him that from day one in our fashion art class. I honestly had no idea what his real name was. "What are you doing here?" I asked, incredulous.
"I'm Seth's roommate's boyfriend. What are you doing here?" He gave me a wink.
Pulling into myself, my eyes glazed over in disgust. "Well, it looks like I was Seth's one night stand."
Fashionista howled. "Oh, honey, you do look like you're doing the walk of shame. But don't let it bother you. I hear Seth's an amazing one night stand. Too bad he won't give me a whirl."
At that moment, Officer Crowley walked in. This day was getting stranger and stranger.
"Babe, it's not nice to taunt Seth's women."
Looking at the massive hulk of muscles, tattoos, and body hair, I said, "I can assure you, I'm not his woman."
It was as if Fashionista never heard me. "But, E., I know her. She's Siobhan Day from my art class."
"Oh God, you're right! Hey, Siobhan remember me?" he crowed, waving at me like a ten year old fan.
I rubbed my temples. The headache was only growing worse. "Oh God," I moaned.
"Siobhan," Seth interjected. "You want a plate? You should eat something."
Bouncing up, Fashionista hit my shoulder and said, "You two should come with us. We're going to the Spice Festival. Should be a lot of fun. I hear it's supposed to be even better than the romance festival this year."
Emerett wrapped his arms around Fashionista and purred, "Remember last year, darlin'? That was so nice. We had a full moon, too."
Aww...those two were actually very cute together, although I would have NEVER in a million years dreamed that the southern goofball I'd met back when I was a teen was gay. I guess you should never believe in stereotypes.
"You want to go?" Seth asked me, jarring me back to reality.
"To the festival?" I asked.
I stared. "Has hell frozen over?"
"Well, actually it is pretty icy in here at the moment."
Emerett called out to us, "Y'all come on out. It'll be fun."
"Oh, hon, let the two love birds have their moment alone. C'mon."
As the bacon, cheese and eggs melted in my mouth, my mind attacked me with what might have happened last night.
My cheeks flushed as images of me doing God knew what with Seth appeared in my vision.
I could almost see him hovering over me.
Did I ....?
"You were really something last night," Seth said, breaking the silence and thankfully, obliterating those awful thoughts.
I just couldn't believe he'd take advantage of an obviously incoherent drunk like that. I remember getting out of control. It was like I just couldn't stop drinking. I wanted to forget all about Julien and his bimbo. When Tulip and my other friends wanted to leave to go to another club, I told them I would take a cab home, that I wasn't feeling well. They tried to talk me out of it, but I was adamant. Once they left, I decided to dance a little. Then I remembered going upstairs and pounding down a few more martinis. After that, the night went black for me. I couldn't remember anything. Especially Seth taking me home. Rage bubbled up as I thought through what must have happened. "How dare you take advantage of me like that? Do you realize how awful it is to wake up in a stranger's bed? What happened?"
I knew it was bad of me to make her think I banged her last night. But she put me through hell the night before and a part of me wanted to make her pay.
"You really want to know?" I asked.
"Of course I want to know," she spat.
"We didn't do anything. Not even close."
I wished she wasn't this beautiful in the morning even with no makeup on. I really didn't want to be attracted to her. She obviously had a whole pirate's chest full of issues that I didn't need or want to deal with but there was just something about her I couldn't let go.
She glared at me with a huge battery of accusations behind it. "Then where are my clothes?"
"Okay, I'll tell you everything, but you're not going to like it."
"You passed out at my bar about an hour before closing. Since we were low on customers, my boss let me leave early. I was going to call a cab only I couldn't get into your phone to figure out where you lived. So, I had to take you to my place. I figured you be pissed as hell at me like you are, but what was I supposed to do? I don't know any of your friends.
"So, once we got to my place, you threw up all over yourself. Your clothes, everything. I picked you up and got you to the bathroom but it was too late."
"You had nothing left in you. Just dry heaving into the toilet.
"You were a stinking mess.
"When I tried to get you out of the bathroom, you stumbled and passed out on my floor. I couldn't wake you, even though I tried really hard.
"So, I had to pick you up and carry you to my bed.
"Your clothes were so smelly and full of shit. Did you really want me to leave you like that? So, I had to get you out of that mess and put you in one of my t-shirts. I left your bra and panties on. Your clothes are in the dryer. And that's the whole fucked up story. Honest."
"Really?" she asked.
"Siobhan, I'm really tired. I slept on the couch all night and that couch is not made for a six foot five guy. I would have loved to have slept right beside you except you still have a bit of vomit on your hair, so no. I didn't."
She put her hands in her face. "Oh God...that's worse than me sleeping with you."
"Nice," I said. She kind of looked cute getting all embarrassed like that. But then I got a whiff of that awful puke smell and noticed a few chunks still in her hair. "Hey, if you want to take a shower, it's down the hall to the left. I'll have your clothes on my bed if you want to change into them. Once you're done, you won't have to see me again. I promise."
She laughed, shaking her head sheepishly. "I-I'm...God...I'm really sorry...it's just...yeah, it's not a story you want to hear, that's for sure. And thanks for the shower." Patting her stomach, she said, "You know, you're a great cook. Those were the best bacon egg omelets I've ever had. Great hangover food. You seem like an expert. Do you always rescue drunk girls from work?"
I smirked. "Wouldn't you like to know?"
Oh God...I was totally blown away by how nice Seth was...and red hot embarrassed about thinking badly of him when he wiped up all my nasty vomit off his floor, off of me...I died a thousand deaths whenever I thought about it. Most people would have called the cops. I deserved to land in jail for what I pulled.
My top was ruined by the clothes dryer, but I wasn't about to blame Seth. He did what he could. It was probably a nasty mess anyway. No way would I have taken it to the cleaners. So, I asked him if I could wear his t-shirt home. I'd drop it by the bar when he worked next.
"There's one thing you could do for me, though," he said when I was about to say good bye.
"Go to the spice festival with me."
My cheeks grew warm. Why would he want to go out with me when I was a total freaky repulsive basket case last night? I had no clue. But if he wanted to, I couldn't say no. It was the least I could do for him.
Smiling, I said, "Okay. Let me get a nap. I should feel better by five tonight."
"I'll meet you at the festival at 6 then."