Chapter 3.19
Siobhan
I decided to give Uncle Clarke a call. Maybe Daddy went over to the Rock Penthouse to hang out with his band or do some work to get his mind off things.
"Uncle Clarke? Is Daddy over there? He's not answering his phone."
"No...haven't heard from him since last night. How did it go?"
"Terrible. Listen, I'm worried about him. Can you go check his penthouse and see if he's there? I want him to call me. He shut off his phone."
"Sure. I'll go right over. If he's not around, I'll let you know."
"Thanks."
But I didn't get a call back. And when I tried to contact Uncle Clarke, his phone went to voicemail, too.
I was about to panic and run over to Daddy's penthouse. Fuck the rules. But then my phone buzzed. It was Grandpops. He sounded off...like he'd been crying. "Sweetheart...I have some bad news."
*****
My stomach felt as if someone was squeezing it as my heart pounded.
God. This couldn't be happening.
Daddy overdosed. Thankfully, Uncle Clarke found him and called 911. I knew something like this might happen. My mother was such a fucking bitch. If I hated her before, it was nothing to what I was feeling now. What did she expect would happen when she ripped everything away from him?
My grandfathers picked me up, but their car wasn't going fast enough. We weren't sure if Daddy was going to make it yet. Uncle Ben said he was in a coma and hopefully, would come out of it in a few days, but he couldn't be sure. Daddy had a seizure when he got to the hospital. It was all so scary. My mind raced on what was going to happen if he died. I couldn't take that. I tried not to cry, but I couldn't help it. I was so worried, feeling out of control.
When we entered Daddy's room, it was as if my mother slapped me.
Mother was holding Daddy's hand like she actually cared about him!
Marching over to her, I screamed, "No way in fucking HELL do you get to be here. You're the reason he might die!"
All the anger I'd had pent up within me exploded. I pushed her and yelled, "You fucking WHORE! GET OUT OF HERE!" She stumbled backward, falling to the ground.
But before I could jump on top of her and yank out her hair, Grandpops pulled me back from behind. "No, Siobhan. This won't help."
I struggled with him for a few moments. I just wanted to make her suffer like she made him. "Let go! She deserves everything she gets!"
Grandpop's loud strong voice penetrated me. "No, Siobhan. STOP!"
Bursting into tears, I cried into my Grandpop's chest as he stroked my arms, whispering soothing words to me. I hated seeing Daddy on that hospital bed with her next to him. How dare she?
Granddad walked over to her and said, "Winter. Please. Let us have some privacy with our son."
Wiping her eyes, she muttered, "Yes. Of course. I'm...um...sorry."
Seeing Daddy laying there crushed me. How could all this be happening?
I stayed by Daddy's side, pleading with him to wake up, but he didn't even twitch. God. I felt so helpless.
The day was almost over and Granddad said he'd take me home. I protested, furiously, but he insisted. Grandpops would stay with Daddy tonight and besides, Granddad had an idea on what to do next. He knew I wasn't about to live with Mother anymore.
The plan eased my rage, though, and I promised Granddad I'd be calm. He would pick me up the following day to see Daddy again.
When I got home, I knew where I'd find her.
She was so predictable it made me gag.
She was such a lush. How could she steal everything from Daddy when she herself was drunk all the time?
Easing into the seat next to her, I asked, "You still love him, don't you?"
She sighed, putting down her cocktail, not saying anything.
"That's why you don't pay attention to Pax anymore. Why did you do it then? Why did you divorce Daddy if you love him?"
When she just sat there, looking like such a victim, I got mad. She wasn't the one fighting for her life in a hospital. "Answer me! I deserve to know! Why would you shatter the man you love?"
"Siobhan...you think I wanted this to happen? It tears me apart to see him like that. I was praying for him when you came in just like I did when he was so broken after that accident." She wiped her eyes and sniffed. "Yes, to answer your question, I do still love him. I'll always love him, but...I just couldn't allow him to sweep in and out of our lives like that. If he cared about us, wouldn't he stay home to be with us? We'd talked about it, too, but he wouldn't give it up. And his tours were getting longer and longer. I guess...I was tired of it. Of being a single mother when he'd come home as the almighty rock star. And in your eyes as well. I was the one doing all the hard work. And then Pax..." She shook her head as I noticed a look of regret muddling her features.
I glared at these pitiful excuses. "And then Pax is right. Daddy found you in bed with him. What a slap in the face to find your wife screwing your best friend. But you didn't stop there. You were determined to mess up his life by using us as pawns in a chess game to destroy him. Well not anymore. I'm done."
"Siobhan...what did you expect me to do? He's a drug addict. No sensible mother would ever let her children be exposed to that. I didn't do it out of malicious intent. I was protecting you and your brothers."
She was so good at manipulation. So innocent. I knew better. "But you didn't even think to call him and talk to him about it. You just went straight to the fucking lawyer! I mean, God, Mother! He only smoked pot one night. You knew he didn't have much in his system and you went after him like he was shooting up heroine. I don't buy your shitty explanations. I'm going to live with Aunt Dakota. If you stop me, my grandfathers will hire their own lawyers to take me from you and you'll probably lose my brothers as well."
Eyes glistening, she shook her head. "You don't have to threaten me, Siobhan." Shrugging in utter defeat, she said, "I understand. But remember this--I tried my best. I might have made some mistakes. Some huge ones. If I could go back and do everything over, things would be different, but I can't. I'm tired of fighting you. Go on and leave me then, if that's what you want."
Standing up, I said, "Granddad is picking me up tomorrow and helping me move my stuff. And by the way, don't call me. Ever. I want nothing to do with you."